Ada likes to tell stories

Most of them are a "I said and then you said and then I said, like that" format.
Others are "When I was a baby I said goo goo ga ga, like that" style.
Many are the "I am a fairy or princess or fox or mermaid..." full stop.
Now some stories are having their influence. We run away from wolves and play make believe in a cave. I am a friendly wolf.
The wolves are coming. Quickly, Quickly!

24 September 2014

'cleaning' the house in 5 steps

I am not as house proud as some. People coming over is generally when I whiz round and get some cleaning done. Lately though I have been on a spring cleaning buzz, trying to throw away some stuff so that there is less stuff to tidy! What I prefer to do is organise it somewhere and keep it.. But these two things are not always compatible. We have lived here two years and I am still improving the 'everything has a place' rule. In particular we have a new kitchen (yay!) with less storage so I am inspired to purge. Tis hard work but I don't want to grow up to be a hoarder. Wish me luck.

So, imagine a last minute visitor at your house and  things could look better... Here are my 5 steps to a 'clean' house. You can now benefit from my time saving tips gleaned from years of laziness (other priorities)! These will not be for everyone. If you are a neat freak, don't read any more... I think this list can be done in about 15-20 minutes?! Hopefully beds are made and table and bench is wiped. I am have been working on that this year. Gosh for shame, how old am I? Here you go, 5 steps to house reasdy!

1. Vacuum the floor in the main room and hallway if possible. This may involve putting toys away. Toy baskets are essential here or put them under a child's bed for another clean up later! I have a stick vacuum that I love, so this step is now super fast.

2. Clean the toilet. Ground breaking stuff right. Toddlers in the house means this just needs doing often. Don't skimp here!

3. If your hard floors need attention wipe around the corners of the room with a damp used tea towel or hand towel you then throw in the wash

4. Get your dishes in dishwasher! In extreme cases they can go in the oven or a cupboard! Revolutionary I know.

5. Put clothes in laundry baskets. Having a basket in each room is a bit of an intermediate step for me, I just don't seem to have a putting clothes away mojo. Ada is always pulling out more...

So there you have it! All done. Just enough tidy...

14 months

My little miss is mama's girl this week. Olive comes to sit on my knee whenever she can and asks to be picked up to watch what is going on as much as she can get away with. My action baby is sitting still with me, it's lovely. Olive is into everything and all the recent photos of her seen to document her desire to get messy often. 50% of a wash is her stuff. Sigh.

Olive loves the swing and her baby at the moment. Baby goes to bed with Olive and I am offered to kiss baby last thing at night, through the cot rails, rather than Olives own face! Our house is back in multiple baby land. Prams are big business around here.

Olives new skills include climbing and being silly on purpose. Words that begin with b are popular (baby, bird and bath) and d words are gathering speed (down). I'm glad I used a handful of baby signs, eat, drink, more, all done, sleepy and down. They are all useful at some point in the day. Olive shakes her head no a lot and nods yes a bit. When she wants something she does an awesome face with eyes lit up and a big mouth with a long inward gasp. It's adorable. Pointing and grizzling are other key communication features... New foods are frozen blueberries and have I mentioned baked beans already?

Onward and upward darling girl. Xxx

3 day toilet training, ah try three months?

I had heard of this technique and wanted to get in on it before summer was over. Two of my friends had it work a treat for them. Notice I am writing this at the beginning of spring, not a good sign? When I read up about it they recommended doing it before 2 and a half so in that sense our timing was about perfect. The websites recommended that the kid can communicate, is interested in toileting and can hold on, all things Ada was doing. The gist of this technique is to go COMPLETELY nappy free, bye bye nappies forever and don't look back. This method assumes that after about 15 'successes' over the three days your little one will understand the sensation and be able to associate that with hopping on the potty in time to go! Sounds a dream... lets try it! On day one you stay home and drink lots of drinks, hopefully hanging out in your house with wooden floors or in the kitchen or outside if it is summer time. As soon as the kiddo starts to wee (or poop, eep) pick them up and pop them on the potty and CELEBRATE your head off for ANY successful business in there. Day two is similar but you venture out in the avo, going to the toilet/potty before you leave and finally on day three you venture out in the morning, again sitting on the potty before leaving. 

At the time Ada only drank water and definitely didn't enjoy being told what to do. A bit of a stubborn streak/two year old assertion perhaps? So my little lady couldn't be convinced to drink more nor submit to trying to sit on the potty when asked. Also miss Ada does about 2 wees during a normal day and just held on and held on, after about 5 days she had only 'let go' out of a nappy about 6 times. The first time we tried she got sick, developed a UTI and was in severe rebellious mode when it came to the potty. On trial two, we took it sooo easy, Ada was in charge of whether she complied by sittng on the potty before bed or leaving the house and she got whisked to the toilet as soon as she said 'wees'. It still took weeks for our success rate to climb to 15. It even took days before we had an accident on the floor, these were all at someone elses house! SORRY GUYS. She actually did more wees on other peoples floors than our own. Suddenly it clicked and she was going to the toilet well for wees. Ada held on number twos until nappies went on for naps/bedtime (I didn't abandon nappies for 3 hour sleeps or overnight, I think some folk do!). Then that all clicked into place too. It is months later and she still gets help on the toilet and will let go at Playcentre rather than realise that she needs get to the loo in time... But, these moments are fewer and farther between now. So I would still recommend the three day technique for those who are game, but we took about three weeks for the first lots of very regular successes and three months for her to be almost in charge of it all herself. Phewf....

Maybe Olive will want to stay in nappies forever?

(p)raising girls

I used to be 'for women' but not a 'feminist', a distinction that I no longer see the need to make. I kinda think women don't get a fair deal and I want to see that change, sounds a bit like a feminist I guess. Now that I have two girls I really care about what works with how I parent them. I do see boys and girls as different and that will lead to some differences in how we relate to each, but articles like this one show me that as a parent I want to be mindful how I talk to my girls, particularly because they are girls. It talks about the messages girls generally get versus the messages boys get during schooling and how they impact on the child's desire to make an effort. Kids (often girls) who are always 'good' and 'clever' and always told so seem to find it very unsettling when they can't do something first try (I can still relate to this at times!). However the message 'if you would just put in some effort I am sure you will succeed' explains to a kid (often a boy who can't sit still for example), that we persist when things are difficult and that success is the result of effort. It sounds simple enough...

There seems to be lots of study and discussion about what sort of praise works. At Playcentre for example there is a general philosopy to be as specific as possible with praise (Faber and Mazlish talk about this in their book, How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk). This article here echoes the first one I mention above and encourages the reader to praise girls effort during the process rather than the only at the outcome. “The kids who are getting this process praise, those are the kids who want the challenge.” Praising persistence, engagement and perseverance through frustration builds resilience.

This is easy to say and hard to do but I am willing to practice. Ada is 3 months off three and up until now really has flitted between activities both at home and at Playcentre. Though it seems this is changing and I'm excited to see her interests develop. Until then we will continue to sing let it go and play with stickers!

Here she is on a gym trip persisting with the rings, she loves them! Go girl!